Dear Pastor,

About three years ago I somehow found myself in a forbidden sexual relationship with my sister’s live-in partner. I was 21 years at the time.
This happened because I was staying over at my sister’s house while completing my degree at university, and he uses to shower me with money and clothing outside of my sister’s knowledge.
Even when he presented me with an expensive Samsung phone, and later a tablet, I lied to my sister and told her that someone whom I was dating had given me those things as gifts.

My sexual relationship with him had lasted for about a year, after which I went back to my parent, since that was the original arrangement.

By that time I was feeling used and terrible for actually betraying my sister. However, I did my best to overcome it and subsequently started to date someone else. But even so, I still use to talk to him on the phone.

However, about six months ago, my sister separated from him because she caught him cheating with one of her co-workers, and he had also lied to her about another girl who later became pregnant for him.

My problem now is that he has been messaging me a lot lately and is asking me to resume a secret relationship with him because he still loves me.
He has promised to help me to down pay on a car which I would have love to have.

I want to believe that he has some feelings for me and genuinely wants to be with me.

And since he is no longer with my sister, do you think that it would be wrong if get into a secret relationship with him, even for a while?

I doubt that my sister would know because we both lives far away from him, and I am now old enough to go wherever I want without explaining anything to anyone.

Confused

 


Reply

Dear confused,

I can’t help but to tell you that you would be a complete fool if you are to further your silly thinking by going to bed with your sister’s ex again.

You have already played the role of a two-timing ungrateful sister who seemingly wants to graduate into a full time home wrecker.

I am guessing that you have not realized that you had given yourself carelessly to this man for an entire year for the sake of a mobile phone, knowing that you were betraying your sister, while exposing yourself to STD’s and ridicule.

You did not say if you have a job or is still dating the other person that you quoted.

But from taking a broader look at things, you also seemed to be straddled by the forces of greed, covetousness and vanity.

Rather than wanting to sleep with your sister’s ex to raise the down payment for a car, you should have been busy trying to work for your own money.

If you had any love for your sister, and had wanted to avert yourself from being a promiscuous shame and disgrace to your relatives, you would have tell that dirty man off a long time ago, and live your life with some dignity.

Guyana is a small country in any case; – which means your sister can eventually find out about your betrayal. And the end result might not be so pretty after all.

So my advice to you now is to run as far away as possible from that man, and repent for your past sins.

Your soul seriously needs to be saved.

Pastor

If you have a story to share, or need some frank answers to your risky questions, please send them in confidence to: dearpastor@guyanaguardian.com